It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
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just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
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I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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