im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize