The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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