Where did you get a picture of my penis
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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