I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just sent this text using only my big toe
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize