Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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