Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
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