They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
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I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
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By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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