I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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