i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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