I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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