idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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