how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
There r osticjed everywhere
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
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