How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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