ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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