why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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