I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Help. Why am I so naked?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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