12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
they need to just BURY HIM!
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize