so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
My brain says no but my pants say off.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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