Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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