Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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