my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
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