Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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