I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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