Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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