Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Randomize