Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
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