dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize