Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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