just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize