I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
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Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
i think i just lost a toe
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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