That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize