I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Randomize