I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
3 2 1 whiskey
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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