real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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