I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
there is another microwave in the elevator.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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