I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize