A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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