Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
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