NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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