Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (904): i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps http://tfl.nu/x84f
  Replies (85) Good night (6215) Bad night (418) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous. http://tfl.nu/a664
  Replies (22) Good night (4247) Bad night (526) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record? http://tfl.nu/dn2a
  Replies (37) Good night (860) Bad night (4244) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  Please get laid.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot. (1-919): Please get laid. http://tfl.nu/xffk
  Replies (37) Good night (1773) Bad night (5726) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole. http://tfl.nu/0fwa
  Replies (35) Good night (1622) Bad night (7000) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (910): I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through. http://tfl.nu/z33k
  Replies (14) Good night (1749) Bad night (4303) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  oh god was she eating orange peels again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): oh god was she eating orange peels again http://tfl.nu/g701
  Replies (8) Good night (1062) Bad night (2288) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (252): My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck. http://tfl.nu/s2z9
  Replies (19) Good night (1093) Bad night (2852) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point. http://tfl.nu/ezlw
  Replies (14) Good night (2331) Bad night (943) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed. http://tfl.nu/yrbs
  Replies (7) Good night (813) Bad night (1416) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups. http://tfl.nu/ij1j
  Replies (1) Good night (1108) Bad night (322) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (970): Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy http://tfl.nu/dxdl
  Replies (7) Good night (2282) Bad night (323)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else http://tfl.nu/vcs9
  Replies (4) Good night (223) Bad night (656) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed http://tfl.nu/55n0
  Replies (5) Good night (644) Bad night (253) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack. http://tfl.nu/wwoa
  Replies (3) Good night (643) Bad night (116)

Randomize