Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
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