Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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