so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
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god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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