I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
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