Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
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