So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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