it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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