After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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