did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize